


Ugly doppelgänger

by Ninjagokata



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Brotherly Bonding, Fluff, Gen, Good Sibling Diego Hargreeves, Good Sibling Klaus Hargreeves, Good Sibling Number Five | The Boy, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, No Incest, Number Five | The Boy-centric, Sibling Bonding, Swearing, Underage Drinking, good siblings all aroundd
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-21
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:29:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28214745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ninjagokata/pseuds/Ninjagokata
Summary: Two apocalypses averted, and Five didn't know what to do. Looking at his portrait gave him an idea.Or- Three idiotic brothers somehow find themselves playing a game of darts and bonding over it.Set after S2, no Sparrows, just a normal timeline with loads of potential for family bonding.
Relationships: Diego Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy & Diego Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy & Diego Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves, Number Five | The Boy & Klaus Hargreeves
Comments: 18
Kudos: 140





	Ugly doppelgänger

**Author's Note:**

> Pogo's still dead in this timeline. (sorry Pogo)  
> Technically a bit of underage drinking? If Five can be counted as that??

The Hargreeves mansion was currently nearly empty. The occupants being Number Two, Four, Five and their mother.

Five was looking around the living room, drink in his hand, while sitting on one of the bar stools. Thinking over his life choices and all that.

The second apocalypse was over, no third one showing up over the horizon, and frankly, Five didn’t know what to do with himself. He didn’t have any hobbies, his siblings were rarely home, and he hated to say it, but he was _bored_. And his drink only made him _more_ miserable. _Fan-fucking-tastic._

While skimming over the living room, his eyes landed at his portrait. That _god-awful_ portrait.

Five would bet that Reginald had it made that ugly knowingly, or he just didn’t know what Five looked like. The first one fit his father as well as the other.

_Why didn’t anyone take it down yet again?_

An idea suddenly struck him. He put his glass down and jumped to his room.

When he re-appeared, he was holding a box of his old throwing darts. He blew the dust off of it, set it down on the living room table and looked at the portrait thoughtfully.

The first dart was picked up, and with that, the game began. First throw, barely missed his target, hit an eye instead. Second throw, way off, hit the chin. _Right, he was a tad drunk._ Third throw, wasn’t really aiming, hit straight in the heart. Fourth throw- Klaus walked in the room.

“Hey, Five-o. What’re you up to-“ He spotted the portrait, “Oh.”

Five grunted in affirmation, aiming his fourth throw again. His younger brother spoke up right as he threw, ruining his precise aim. He hit a hand. _Dammit._ “You know, we could’ve just thrown it out, if hated it that much.”

Five shot Number Four a dead-pan look. “All of us hated it.”

Klaus shrugged, “Yeah, but it’s got your face on it, so you should probably get a vote.”

“It deserved a worse fate, than simply being thrown out.”

“You mean like we did with the old man’s?”

Five snorted at the memory. The painting of Reginald that used to hang over their heads in the living room was currently not there anymore. Luther proposed he wanted to get rid of it one time, and for once in their life, they all found themselves agreeing on something. It was Klaus’ idea for everyone to draw on it with a permanent marker before throwing it out. (Five’s fairly sure Klaus drew a dick right on Reginald’s forehead.) And Vanya’s idea to burn it.

_Fun times._

“Yeah, sort of.” He paused, “Except that was a bit more personal. This is just for its sheer ugliness.”

Number Four laughed and wiped a fake tear away. “I know right? It’s _so_ horrible.”

“It’s _hideous_.”

“And it doesn’t even look like you!” Klaus gestured towards the painting wildly.

Number Five looked back at his portrait and let out a genuine snicker. “It _really_ doesn’t.”

“Yeah! I’ve always said that it just looks like some weird doppelgänger of yours.”

Five smirked and offered Klaus a dart. Klaus grinned. “Oh, hell yeah.”

Surprising both of them, he hit it right between the eyes. _Bull’s eye._ He whooped, “Oh, _baby_! I’m giving Diego a run for his money at this rate!”

His second throw wasn’t as lucky, as he managed to hit the frame instead.

“Aw.” He pouted.

Five came over to him. “Shoo. It’s my turn.”

Klaus sat down on the couch and let out a disbelieving laugh. “ _Shoo_? I don’t think I ever heard you say that word before.” His older brother stifled a small burp. “Wait, are you _drunk_?”

“No.”

Klaus snorted, watching his drunk thirteen-year-old _(Or fifty-eight-year-old? Whatever.)_ brother try to concentrate on his aim. Five’s eyes shifted from the painting to the ground, contemplating.

“Do you think Vanya will mind?”

“What, the fact that you’re drunk?”

Five sputtered and finally eased out of his stance. “What? No- I’m not drunk!” He sneered, “I was asking, if she would mind, that we’d throw out this monstrosity.”

Klaus pondered. He remembered those nights after it was hung up. Vanya sometimes sat by it, looking at it with her sad gaze, as if it held the secrets of the universe. She didn’t like it, Klaus remembered her telling him once. She thought it lacked Five’s confidence and basically his entire personality.

“I don’t think so. It just made her sad.” He let a small smile creep up to his lips. “Plus, she didn’t like it either. All of us thought it didn’t look like you.”

Five looked at his brother with a somber expression. A wave of guilt passing over him. _She was sad because he wasn’t there._ The gloomy atmosphere seemed to sober him up.

He held out another dart towards Klaus, who smiled at him and took it.

Just as he stood up, Diego walked in the room. “Hey, so mom wants to- What are two you doing?”

Both Number Four and Five looked at their brother like deer caught in the headlights

“What does it look like, Diego?” Five flashed him a condescending smile.

“Are you two throwing _darts_ at your portrait?”

“Sure are!” Klaus waved the dart in his hand.

“Give me that.” Diego snatched the dart and inspected it carefully.

He looked back to his two brothers, “Where did you get these?”

“They’re mine.” Five spoke up. “Mom got them for you and me for our tenth birthday.”

Diego blinked, “Oh, yeah. I forgot you had them too.”

He placed the dart back on the table and turned to leave the room. “Give me a second.”

Five huffed as his temperamental brother left the room. “Whatever.” The dart was picked up from the table once again and thrown directly in the center of the forehead. _Close enough._

“Hey! It was _my_ turn!” Klaus whined at his older brother.

Five picked up another dart from the box and smirked at him.

A challenge.

“Oh you tiny rascal!” Klaus lunged at his brother.

“I am _not_ tiny!”

He caught his _tiny_ brother’s hands, trying to pry the dart from his left one. Klaus laughed as he evaded the incoming attacks. Five could’ve jumped out of the situation anytime. And yet he didn’t.

The squabble got broken up when their third brother returned from wherever he’d gone to. He raised his eyebrow at the scene in front of him. Klaus was holding onto Five’s wrists, grinning widely, meanwhile Five had his leg positioned to knee his lanky brother in the crotch, a victorious smile on his face.

“Jesus, I can’t leave you two alone for even five minutes.” He muttered, pushing past them and setting down another box on the table.

Klaus let go of Five, looking over Diego’s shoulder at the second box. “Now, what do we have _here_?”

Five came over and Diego lifted the lid of the box. “Wow. It’s more darts.” Five pointed out flatly.

Number Two picked a random dart out of the box, tossing it over to their smallest brother.

He smirked.

“Yeah, but these ones are sharper.”

**Author's Note:**

> And that's that! I hope you liked it!  
> Please leave a comment or kudos if you can!! It is very appriciated!  
> Also! If you find some grammar mistake, please do tell me, so I can edit it right up!  
> Thank you for reading!


End file.
